By Mark A. Perigard
The Boston Herald
Grade: C
Remember ‘80s cult cop show ‘T.J. Hooker’? One of the more ridiculous elements of that series was Heather Locklear (who was also co-starring on ‘Dynasty’) running around trying to portray a convincing patrol officer.
In a similar vein comes Lifetime’s alleged drama ‘Against the Wall,’ about 30-year-old Chicago street cop Abby Kowalski (Aussie actress Rachael Carpani, ‘McLeod’s Daughters’), who makes detective and takes the only opening the department has - in the Internal Affairs division.
Abby is reluctant to tell her family about her promotion.
‘Growing up, I.A. was worse than the boogeyman in my house,’ she says.
She has three stooges, er, chiseled male models - no, sorry, I’ll get this right - three brothers in uniform, including the especially dimpled Richie (Brandon Quinn, ‘Entourage’), who are horrified by her career trajectory.
That’s just a warm-up to the reaction from her father - and police officer - Don (Treat Williams, ‘Everwood’): ‘Did I teach you nothing? There’s a code every cop lives by: We protect our own.’
Mom Sheila (Kathy Baker, ‘Picket Fences,’ wasted in this wallpaper-thin role) is caught in the middle. Her answer to every crisis seems to be cake.
The premise of a show set in an internal affairs division, almost uniformly derided in cop shows ranging from ‘Hill Street Blues’ to ‘Law & Order: Special Victims Unit,’ is fascinating and could lead to some original, suspenseful stories.
‘Against the Wall’ has little ambition. Abby’s first case involves a cop involved in a bar fight. A last-minute twist at the end should be deadly serious but plays like a misplaced PSA.
The series has an off-kilter comedic tone. Abby’s new partner Lina Flores (Marisa Ramirez, ‘Spartacus: Gods of the Arena’) looks about 17 months pregnant. ‘My husband is a very big man,’ she says.
Much is made of Abby’s klutziness and social ineptitude. She has a ‘friends with benefits’ relationship, minus the friendship, with the one guy on the force she apparently isn’t related to.
In her best moments, Abby’s ditzy behavior calls to mind Meg Ryan in her rom-com era, albeit with a room-temperature IQ. Call this one ‘Sleepless in Chicago with a Badge.’
Or a criminal waste of time.
Copyright 2011 Boston Herald Inc.