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5 things you should know about communicating with female cops

Here are a few helpful insights


The bottom line is that women contribute great communication skills to police work.

The public often sees female police officers as all warm and fuzzy. Look at those nice girls! However, when push comes to shove, we can unleash the Apocalypse. Well, that and we can bullshit with the best of them. Even that wrath might be fake. Or is it?

Clearly, communicating in the police world is not without its challenges. Sometimes things get jumbled up in translation. To help clear up gender transmission barriers, here are a few helpful insights about conversing with female cops:

1. Don’t expect us to sugarcoat things.

While there are those with tons of diplomacy, police officers often resort to blunt vocabulary. With all the Type A personalities in one group, we don’t have time to jerk you around. Female police officers have also adapted the same mentality as male peers in that we like things upfront and direct. The sugar and spice are reserved for those other girls. We sisters in blue like to tell it like it is.

If our peers piss us off or do something stupid, we will be straight up in your face about it. Additionally, if we feel “that” special citizen would benefit from fire, we become the dragon lady with the right message. Sometimes you don’t even have to ask for that assistance. Step aside so you don’t get hit with any shrapnel.

2. We have a natural ability to diffuse confrontations.

There may well be heated discussions between officers, but plunk a Lady LEO down in a stormy situation or pair one of us with a victim and we can bring about a sense of calmness and peace with the quickness. It’s a gift. Our nurturing, caring, and nonviolent ways can turn even the most aggressive and violent situations into butter.

3. We have the right to remain silent, but we usually don’t.

Silence has its place in law enforcement, but not as a punishment for our peers. So if we get our feelers hurt (I said “if”), we can’t afford to have that big of a rift in a working relationship. After all, our lives depend on each other. Perhaps a short time-out is all that is necessary to regroup. Maybe we will eat your share of the donuts for revenge. Public shaming could be an option. Most often, we work it out and move on. Broken crayons still have to color.

Quietude has its valuable place in the toolbox, though. Most often, it gets used as an active listening device when dealing with the general public.

4. Our facial expressions and body language tell all.

Of course our eyebrows are on fleek. We use them to make our facial expressions more meaningful. Learn the language. Most of the time we try to remain in poker face mode. However, on ridiculous calls, we may communicate to our peers in snarls, raised brows, smirks, and nostril flares. If you work with us long enough, you know what we are thinking or what we are about to say.

Gestures and mannerisms are also a great way to signal codes to your partner. We do it well. During certain moments we could razzle dazzle you with warning signs. For instance, you might observe us displaying a “that dude is ready to go to jail” pose. Watch for it.

5. Cats don’t always play nice.

It is no secret that most of us female officers do not fancy nasty girl transports. Of course it is our job to deal with all the unsavory characters dwelling in our community. For some reason, barmy broads are irritating and rub us the wrong way. It seems like they are so cooperative and all “nicey nice” with most of the male officers but when the blue chick shows up on scene…well, their cuckoo kicks in.

Most of us muscle through these transports with resting bitch face. Other times we light into them with a stick of verbal dynamite and it becomes “Clash of the Titans.”

5 1½ . Rules do not apply.

Rules 1-5 may or may not be standard go-to protocols. We can throw out all the rules on a whim. We are that quick and nimble. And why wouldn’t we want to keep you guessing? That’s half the fun.

The bottom line is that women contribute great communication skills to police work. Negotiations and gaining compliance through our choice of dialogue and tone is an asset to our departments. Much of it is natural ability derived from our understanding of human relationships and responsibilities. Men are more geared toward rules, rights, and regulations, speaking in a language of formulas. We speak the language of love and respect.

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