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Best of Bizarre Beat: Top 15 strangest stories of 2017

We’ve gathered up the 15 funniest, strangest, and most unbelievable stories of the year


This article is part of our 2017 Year in Review special coverage. Take a look back at some of this year’s most heroic saves and other impactful moments in policing with features from our expert columnists and multimedia lists of the year’s top moments, here.


By Police1 Staff

It’s that time again! From poop-and-run joggers to drunken “time travelers,” frequent run-ins with Weird America is just a part of the deal of being a police officer, and with the year coming to a close, we’ve gathered up the 15 funniest, strangest, and most unbelievable stories of 2017 in our annual “Best of Bizarre Beat” roundup. Click the headlines for the full articles, and if you had a bizarre encounter on the beat this year, share your story with us in the comments section.

1. Colo. cops search for poop-and-run jogger

(Photo/Colorado Springs Police Department)

A serial defecator dubbed “The Mad Pooper” brought a Colorado neighborhood to its knees this year.

2. Man proposes to girlfriend during his arrest

The couple plan to set a wedding date when the man’s legal troubles are sorted out. Love truly knows no bounds.

3. Fla. men attempt to steal power pole

(Photo/Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office)

Yet another classic entry in the “Florida man” category.

4. 83-year-old man ends police standoff by pushing suspect off roof

When you’re 83, you have no time for shenanigans.

5. Eels from overturned truck slime cars on highway

(Photo/Oregon State Police)

How long do you think the smell stayed with them?

6. Former mint worker who hid stolen gold in rectum sentenced

The man stole 22 cookie-sized pieces of gold by hiding them in his rectum, worth an estimated $127,116.11. That’s a lot of dirty money.

7. Internet goes nuts after Chicago PD posts photo of old-timey gun

(Photo/Chicago Police Department)

“Damn they booked my guy who came all the way from Jumanji,” one user wrote.

Another user asked if they were able to free the “damsel he had tied to the tracks before the train got there.”

8. Sheriff’s office warns public not to shoot at Hurricane Irma

(Photo/Pasco Sheriff’s Office)

A joke gone awry led police in Florida to issue a warning about shooting at hurricanes. Because Florida.

9. Mo. detective ends interview after suspect answers question with ‘loud fart’

(Photo/Jackson County Detention Center)

The investigator should have continued the interview - the suspect was simply clearing his head.

10. Accused burglar doesn’t flush toilet, leaves DNA for police

(Photo/Ventura County Sheriff)

When you gotta go, you gotta go.

11. Man tries to steal patrol car with police officer in it

(Photo/St. Lucie County Police)

Sometimes the criminals come to you.

12. Fla. man urinates, falls asleep in front of Steak ‘n Shake customers

(Photo/Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office)

Desecrating a Steak ‘n Shake should come with a 20-year sentence, at minimum.

13. Arrested drunk man claims he time traveled to warn of aliens


The man told cops he was only able to time travel because aliens filled his body with booze.

14. Man having sex in car chastises cop for ‘blocking’ him

(Photo/LaCrosse Police)

After asking them to get dressed and get out of the car, the officer realized the couple had resumed having sex.

15. Photo: Fleeing Ariz. burglar pantsed by fence, found hanging upside down

(Photo/Jesse Sensibar)

The man who took this incredible photo said the suspect smiled for the camera.