Editor’s Note: This week’s PoliceOne First Person essay is from PoliceOne Member Gil Contreras, an instructor in the ICDC College Homeland Security and Investigations Program. In PoliceOne “First Person” essays, our Members and Columnists candidly share their own unique view of the world. This is a platform from which individual officers can share their own personal insights on issues confronting cops today, as well as opinions, observations, and advice on living life behind the thin blue line. If you want to share your own perspective with other P1 Members, simply send us an email with your story.
By Gil Contreras
Police1 Member
In the 2009 film Zombieland, the main character, Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) found himself on a cross country trek to the West Coast of the former United Sates, after it has fallen into chaos caused by a mutated strain of Mad Cow Disease which had turned ordinary Americans in to flesh eating Zombies! In order to survive in Zombieland, Columbus creates a list of survival “rules” which he hopes will ensure his long term survival in his new country, the United States of Zombieland.
As an instructor in the ICDC College Homeland Security and Investigations Program, I teach use of force, emergency management, critical problem analysis, and other subjects relevant to working in the law enforcement / homeland security field.
I recently watched Zombieland on DVD with my daughter, and found myself marveling at the similarities between surviving in Zombieland and police officer survival training. So, what follows below are some of Columbus’ Rules for Surviving Zombieland, and their officer survival counterpart!
Note: In the movie Zombieland there were 33 rules (see end of article), not all were covered in the movie, nor will they all be covered here, however, the ones most relevant to officer safety are included!
Zombieland Survival Rules
1.) Cardio — In the movie, Columbus asserts that having good cardio is essential to survival in Zombieland — in fact, he says the first victims of the zombies were “the fatties,” mainly because they couldn’t outrun their zombie predators!
As any police officer can tell you, having good cardio is not only good practice for staying healthy, but it serves you well should you have to go in foot pursuit of a suspect who may be 10-15 years younger than yourself. And, from an officer safety perspective, if you do go in foot pursuit you have to have something left in your tank when you catch the suspect and he/she resists.
Unfortunately, there have been many officers who have had to go hands-on, one-on-one, with a parolee who won’t give up, and the officer loses not only the fight, but his/her life as well. In such circumstances, officers must have the strength, cardio, fighting technique and warrior mindset to overcome the resisting “zombie.”
2.) Double Tap — The one thing Columbus learns about zombies early on is that just because you shoot one, doesn’t necessarily mean they’re dead. As Columbus says in the movie, “For those moments when you’re not really sure the undead are really dead, dead... don’t get all stingy with your bullets... one more clean shot to the head [will ensure your zombie is down] ... woulda, coulda, shoulda.”
LAPD officers involved in the North Hollywood Shootout in 1997 learned that even crooks can wear body armor and be just as hard to kill as a zombie! When I went to the police academy in 1984 we were taught the Double Tap, two shots to the chest and one shot to the head in case your crook doesn’t stop his behavior which caused you to use deadly force in the first place. Columbus is right, don’t get all stingy with your bullets, however, just remember that as law enforcement professionals we want to ensure the suspect stops his criminal act, but we must also ensure that our use of the Double Tap is well within the limits of the law and your department policy.
3. Beware of Bathrooms — in Zombieland, Columbus finds that the one place he’s most vulnerable to attack is, well, sitting on the throne in the men’s room. Columbus learns to check each stall and clear the restroom before relaxing enough to relieve himself.
In law enforcement, we can never really “relax” anywhere. As we learned in the killing of four police officers in a coffee shop in Lakewood (Wash.), officers must be vigilant everywhere, all the time. Indeed, check the bathroom or the restaurant you’re entering, the people coming and going from the coffee shop, or your radio call location before, during, and after you’ve completed your “business.”
4.) Wear Seatbelts — In the movie, Columbus tells us, “Pretty basic, fasten your seatbelts, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride.”
I remember going to the LAPD range for my monthly qualification one time, and found a black and white unit which had been in a T/C with another LAPD unit responding to a help call. Three officers died in the crash except for one rookie who was wearing his seatbelt.
I remember at the time wearing my seatbelt in my civilian vehicle but not in my police unit. After I saw that mangled mess that used to be a police car, I vowed to never again go in pursuit, respond Code 3, or simply cruise the City Los Angeles without wearing my seatbelt. Columbus is right, pretty basic — a cop’s daily ride can get bumpy as hell.
17.) Don’t Be a Hero — Columbus learns early on that trying to be a hero in Zombieland can get one killed. One of my training officers told me, “there’s no such thing as a hero or a coward out here on these streets, if we have to run for our lives you better run ‘cause I aint waiting around for you.”
Conversely, there are those times when, even against the best advice you’ve been given, you’re going to try to be a hero anyway. Columbus did it for Witchita (Emma Stone). Be sure what you’re motivation is before you slap on your cape and swing into action…remember the law and dept policy before you try to be a hero. As a law enforcement officer, you’re already a hero — there is no need to try to prove it to anyone. You should always use sound tactics, good judgment, and be ready to win each encounter.
18.) Limber Up — Even though Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) was correct, “ever see a lion limber up before it takes down a gazelle?” The truth is, after sitting in a patrol car for an extended period of time one can get a little stiff. Because you may have to jump out of the car to chase a suspect, help a victim, or get yourself out of a kill zone, you should take the advice I got in the academy;
One of my academy instructors told us to periodically stop the unit somewhere safe, get out and stretch and take some deep breaths. When on duty, you gotta be ready to rock and roll all the time!
22.) When in Doubt, Know Your Way Out — In Zombieland, Columbus learned the importance of knowing his way out of whatever location in which he might find himself. One of the first officer survival tactics I learned as a young policeman was to always have an escape route out of any situation or “kill zone.” A kill zone is a confined or funneled area in which an officer may find himself under assault whether by gunfire or physical attack.
An officer may find himself in an unfamiliar location or area after a vehicle or foot pursuit, knowing your location and the location of your partner is critical to your survival. Following Columbus’ advice could save your life…when in doubt, know your way out.
31.) Check the Backseat — In Zombieland, a zombie can appear anywhere, anytime, so, survival required Columbus and the others to always check the backseat before getting into a vehicle.
In police work, a suspect can appear anywhere, anytime. A traffic stop is one of the most dangerous tasks a cop engages in on a daily basis. Whether a vehicle is occupied, unoccupied, or appears to be abandoned, a smart officer always checks the backseat.
In his book, “Officer Down, Code Three” Pierce Brooks, Capt, LAPD (Ret.), chronicled ten deadly errors police officers routinely made which led to their death or serious injury while on-duty — the backseat of a vehicle can be a deadly place to a cop. Check the backseat, indeed, as well as the trunk of the vehicle, the front seat and all passengers.
32.) Enjoy the Little Things — As survival in Zombieland can become stressful and taxing on personal relationships, so too can years of police work. The one thing Tallahassee (Harrelson) had correct in the movie... Enjoy the Little Things. As a cop, family man or woman, you have to learn to enjoy and appreciate the little things in life. I remember feeling that the work I did was so important that I put my wife (at the time) and my son second to the job. This approach came with a very high price.
The guys and gals that I know who sustain a 20+ year police career do so by making other parts of their life just as important as the work they do. Vacations, regular exercise (cardio!), weekend road trips can really recharge the batteries and make you even more effective and vigilant at work. I know most cops feel the department couldn’t survive one day without them, but the truth is, they can and they do. I remember one FTO telling me, “Crime was here when you got here, and crime will be here when you leave.”
So, crime fighters, be safe out there in Zombieland, remember the rules for survival, and learn to enjoy the little things.
